Don't even think of riding that bike in Oklahoma. I hate Oklahoma.I moved to Oklahoma about one year ago with no negative notions about the place. What I discovered were a lot of hostile people who hate people from other states. So I did some investigating. I began to feel bad for these Okies. They obviously had a collective inferiority complex that was a result of being such a poor state and having such horrible government officials. Then I thought they must feel bad because their ancestors were responsible for the worst ecological disaster in the western hemisphere (that’s the Dust Bowl for you Okies who don’t know what I’m talking about). Then I thought they must feel bad because the state itself is so ugly. Then I thought they felt bad about the breast-feeding scene from The Grapes of Wrath (that’s a book for you Okies who don’t know what I’m talking about). Then I thought they must feel bad because prices are so high and wages are so low. Then I thought they must feel bad because they have the lowest personal credit score ratings in the country. But then I realized they have an inferiority complex because they are a bunch of lazy, lame-brained, loud-mouthed, bible-thumping, tobacco-spitting, ignorant, bigoted, yokels! They feel inferior to the rest of the United States because they are inferior! Oh yes, and they can’t drive. Oh wait, and they have horrible roads. As soon as I pass from the Texas border to the Oklahoma border there is no doubt that once again I am, unfortunately, in Oklahoma and… I hate Oklahoma.
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